Ægrus Somnium

i was just thinking, lots of people have ugly babies right when they are born and the parents are always in denial and we always have to be like "oh he/she (sometimes literally) is so cute/pretty", but in nearly 90% of the cases babies have the “uglies” when they are born and turn out cute as hell, but alas, there is a dark side, the side we don’t like to mention, the "cutsies" the unfortunate ones, the adorable little babies, the ones who are reversed, they are cute as hell when born and just turn ugly, in nearly 90% of these cases when the child starts getting around the 7-8 month mark and growing out of the “cutsies” the parents realize what they have created and make a *bag baby, in most cases this is the best thing you can do, save your child the ridicule, embarrassment, beatings, and suffering of being alone their whole life, so please, please keep making “uglies” and if you have a “cutsie” pray to whichever deity you so choose that they stay a “cutsie”, we are also taking donations here at aegrussomnium.com to supply parents of “cutsies” with “cutsie packages” (pamphlets, grief counseling, materials), the packages are distributed by hospitals, directly at the maternity ward to the parents, any denomination is welcome, please make checks payable to the Bag-a-Cutsie Foundation, thank you

*bag baby – when a baby is placed in a burlap bag with a brick and tossed into a body of water

my face hurts and all i have is dark thoughts
the world is closing
all is gone
will it end
i pray to your gods
i finally see the light
it’s the glisten of a knife
the flick of a wrist
the kiss of the steel
all will be bliss
you tell me to wait
plead to still the blade
time and time
caving to your desire
tossed over your shoulder
carried like your cross
your burden is shortening
as my life trickles out
my life’s trail of rust
screaming your endurance

head will no longer rise
heart refuses to beat
another course was tried
a worn trail kept the path true
you can deny fate
but fate won’t deny you
your path is made
your destinations clear
start walking
the void is closing near
as you walk the briers rip
as you pass the briers tear
as you walk your soul bleeds out
as you pass your soul is bare
your sins behind
the child moves on
glass heart so fragile
so full of your fear
as the trail ends you find them
your wrongs
your sins
your accusers
your wrong doers
shadows flicker
shadows dance
a child screams
a glass heart falls
the sun now rises
shadows race in fear
to a dark place they wait
shattered glass glistening
fresh like tears
on the brightly lit plain

the days grows longer, as the sun dies away,
day by day, minute by minute the weight increase,
my toes leaving ruts in the sand as they drag with each hindered step,
the natural compass never guiding towards the light,
always, always leading to the void before me, the gaping pit in the sand,
the sand swirls about it’s lip, as it howls what seems to be a lullaby,
a lullaby of overlapping, echoing silent voices full of promises,
promises of peace,
silence,
comfort,
pleasure,
happiness,
finally, eternal happiness, the closer i step the heavier it gets,
the louder the cacophony of silent screaming,
the closer i tread the more hands fight to restrain me
annoyance and pain, collapsing in the sand i lay and suffer,
unable to reach the beckoning bliss, unable to fend the restrainers,
just there

so yesterday was our cities fireworks, we’re blessed i guess you could say to have one of the best firework families in the world from our city, they even did the olympics a couple times i think, anyways, so like usual family comes over to see the wifes family downstairs and there is tons of free food and we invites friends to come upstairs to our place to chill in the ac play vid game get free food and shit since we’re a block from the display so all is going to plan and yadda yadda yadda no one shows up but whatever fuck ‘em i’m bored of waiting on people, granted i don’t go out a lot but there’s a reason for mine, so i spent the day with my wife and daughter and then stayed up all night til 9am playing alan wake because in the end i’ll always have my wife, daughter, and my video games, the rest of the world can gorge itself on my festering colon, time to climb back over my wall and load the weapons, the world on one side, me on the other, with my games of course lol