“Larsson, who died of a heart attack just before the trilogy was published, was disgusted by sexual violence, having witnessed the gang rape of a young girl when he was 15. According to a friend of his, the author never forgave himself for failing to help the girl, whose name was Lisbeth — just like the young heroine of the trilogy, who is also a rape survivor.”¹

ok, back on topic, the movie adaptation of “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” came out in 2009 with a swedish audio track and american subtitles, but if your not getting it from a rental company and actually spent the few bucks you can have the english audio dub track as well, it seem’s for some people this just isn’t good enough and we need to shit on that here in america, because guess what, a new version is being made in america slated for a december release, really? why, it’s already out and 2 years is way to short a time for a fucking remake, WTF! if your fucking illiterate and won’t buy the movie and will only redbox, or netflix instant a gimped copy, you won’t fucking understand it anyways, and I’m sure this new version is going to fuck up everything anyways, I saw more sex in the trailer then I saw in the original movie, stupid shit

Dad: Just think, everything sucked so bad last year this year can’t possibly get any worse.

Me: No shit, all that can happen now is something could potentially kill me and that would be doing me a favor and we can’t have that that would be too fucking convenient.

Dad: There ya go! See what a little positive thinking will do!

That exchange really happened, my dad is the shit. By the end of 2010 my life could be summed up as a very thin and very ugly looking frail and haggard thread that could snap at any second and send me spiraling into despair so deep that only a Sylvia Plath gas bath could cure. Unlike my terminally depressed life partner, I am not usually a particularly depressed or suicidal person. I am moody, morbid, and pleasantly pessimistic, meaning that I expect everything and anything to go wrong so I am never disappointed and when something goes right for a change I can appreciate it at face value. It was absolutely a shitty year. Fuck 2010. It gave me nothing but defeat, anxiety, depression, puffy eyes, 30lbs, a mean streak, terrible health, and left me with one less Golden Girl. Fuck strokes for taking Rue McClanahan away from me when she had so much more to give us in her twilight years. There were far more celebrities that were less important than she was that could have gone in her place; like anyone that had ever been cast in a Twilight movie, Sarah Palin or Chris Brown, for Christ sake kill that bastard before he breeds little douchebag woman abusing gay bashing pieces of shit. Just leave us Kanye West, he’s good to keep around for comic relief and I like his music. If you aren’t over him interrupting Taylor Swift you can take Rue McClanahan’s place too if you like and take Taylor and her 20 songs about the same fucking thing with you that bitch is annoying. Anyway back to me. In everything terrible that has happened to me personally and to the world globally with earthquakes, economic suicide and BP’s explosive diarrhea all over the gulf coast; I wish I could say I learned something meaningful but really all that was accomplished were affirmations. Indulge me won’t you?

1. This country really is only beneficial to you if you are an illegal alien, a minority, or dead weight. If you have an education, paid into the social security system and paid taxes and suddenly lose your job, you have to fight harder than anyone to survive. Fuck that. I have been trying to find any job now for over a year and have been told that I am “overqualified” more times than I care to hear. Translation, “we don’t want to pay you because we know that you know better so we will hire this uneducated asshole that we know will work twice as much as you for peanuts. Fuck off.”

2. People really do equal shit. This cannot be stressed enough. Seldom does one give a fuck about anyone. People do NOT want to help you as a rule. As much as they try to convince you and even themselves that they do, there is usually some underlying self-serving rationale to either gain something or boost their shitty karma. Family is the worst of the culprits. They will promise you sunshine and rainbows and no sooner shit down your throat and piss in your cornflakes. Family as an institution is no longer sacred but now an excuse to have cause to hurt people without just cause. Existential punching bags that are doomed to indentured servitude and emotional tithing for life merely because of whose vag was the slip n’ slide. As a result we have written off a fair amount of familial bullshit baggage in 2010.

3. No one ever does get out alive. We worked and worried ourselves sick wondering how we would get by, how we would pay this or pay that and how I would finish school and get us out of this hell we are living. We still can’t figure any of it out as we sink deeper into financial and emotional torment. In a week I may find out that I can’t finish school even though I only have one fucking semester left because I can’t find one bank that will lend me the last little bit of financial aid I need. But even if I do and we get out of this, what the fuck is it all for? By the time we finally can breath again we are still working to get by and everyday ticks by closing in on imminent death. When you look at it in the grand scheme of things, we are wasting our lives and it is our own fault. We created the people who oppress us, who keep us from being like them and being happy and we created our misery and for now there isn’t a god damned thing to be done about it.

So what can we do about 2011? First, I will take the “we” out because really, I don’t care what you do with it since I will probably hear or read about it on Facebook anyway. However, since I am too poor to have a vice drugs and alcohol are not viable options. If I am able to finish school I won’t have time for simple pleasures like meditation or video games but will get to those if I am forced to be a loser and quit school. I plan on keeping my pleasantly pessimistic outlook but trying to leave the rest behind, it hasn’t really suited me. I am not making any resolutions because that is too much pressure and my memory sucks anyway. All there is left for me to do is be more fierce and competitive than ever. I want it all and more than anyone because I have to. I am Veruca Fucking Salt now. However, if 2011 even thinks about claiming Betty White I cannot guarantee rational behavior on my part. I leave you now with the iconic words of Ke$ha. Yes I did say Ke$ha and she wrote them all by herself and everything:

Every single night we fight,
To get a little high on life.
To get a little something right, something real.
At least we try. Time after time.
Try dodging all the douche bags guys.
Try trading all the wasted times.
For something real, in this crazy life.

From:
Michael Ayon <janet88703@ mixmail.com>

Subject:
"Thought regarding your website \"aegrussomnium.com\""

Content:
Dear Web Owner,
Want more clients and customers? We will help them find you by putting you on the 1st page of Google. Email us back to get a full proposal
____________________________________________
Sincerely
Mishon vicks
2510 LAS POSAS RD, STE G
CAMARILLO, CA 93010 – USA
____________________________________________

my reply:

i’m glad you think so highly of my site to offer to help, but so low of it that you use a program to pull the site and however many others from the web and stick them in the subject like, would look a little more sincere and not botted if you took out the \" \"" from before and after the site name, and your email address needs a little work as well, say’s your name is micheal ayon, then the email address says janet (janet88703@ mixmail.com), and then you signed the email mishon vicks, if i didn’t have a professional seo in my immediate family i think i would definately avoid one who uses an app to spam the web for clients and has multiple personality disorder, c’mon john, get it together